Rejected!

Rejection. It seems to be the hardest thing to face. We as humans try to avoid it, go out of our way to hide it. Put up every mask or ego, push people away, or just harden our hearts so we don’t have to feel it. But I put myself out there, way out there, showing everything I am, what God has done in my life, and where I feel like He’s taking me. No thanks, they said. We don’t want a part of it, good luck somewhere else. I know that is just not what God wants for me, but I can’t say it doesn’t hurt. For the first time, I don’t want to do all these things that will hide this feeling, I just want to cry. I want to feel it, embrace it, and accept it so I can just move on to what God really wants from me, where He really wants to take me. I guess it is all pride. I considered myself the best. I love what I’m studying, I love what psychology can do in people’s lives, and I believe I know a lot about it. I wanted to believe that I could hang with the best, but the best doesn’t want me. So there’s a big question mark on whether that reveals my true abilities or just a pure NO from God. It is probably the latter but I want to let the doubt echo for a minute.